


hi, bye

by kyuniverse



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, but he regrets it, forbidden relationship, idol!juyeon, just read it idk what to tag, juyeon kinda fucked up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:14:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23748187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyuniverse/pseuds/kyuniverse
Summary: Desperate to protect Chanhee from the hate he's receiving from his fans, Juyeon broke up with him. But he made a mistake: he didn't tell the reason why he's breaking up with him.Fate found a way for them to meet again, and although Juyeon's eyes are still filled with love and longing, Chanhee's has no expression in them anymore.
Relationships: Choi Chanhee | New/Lee Juyeon
Comments: 7
Kudos: 114





	hi, bye

**Author's Note:**

> yes i still suck at writing angst but i got inspired to write one when i saw a juyeon edit on twitter. i'm still practicing how to do angst so i'm sorry if this didn't hurt you enough 
> 
> anyway!! this has a happy ending, but if you want to be sad, then i suggest reading up to part 2 only~
> 
> twitter: @nyuthings

**PART1 ◆ hi, i love you.**   
**bye, i can't be with you.**

When Juyeon was young, he was always asked what he wants to be when he grows up. The time span of him thinking what to answer varies, but in the end it all comes down to one answer — be an idol. Indeed, being an idol is Juyeon's dream job. He always has a passion and a want to perform on stage, in front of many people. He wants to be a performer because he was **born** to be a performer.

So when a chance for Juyeon to achieve his dreams opened, he quickly grabbed the chance. He worked hard, even if the entertainment company is two rides away, even if his social life is gone, even if his grades lowered, even if it leaves him with no time to sleep at all. Who cares about sleep or social life or grades anyways, Juyeon's still happy because he's achieving his dreams. He's still determined because everyone supports him — his family, his friends, and Chanhee.

Chanhee.

If we were to describe Chanhee, it will be Juyeon's world. They were childhood friends, inseparable since birth. When you see Chanhee, expect to see Juyeon too. They were the best of friends, until feelings grew and Juyeon confesses to Chanhee in the first year of high school. In front of everyone, after a duet that they both performed in a school festival.

They were the most perfect couple everyone met. They were a match made in heaven. They're soulmates. And everyone adored them.

Juyeon always deems himself lucky for meeting and getting to be with someone as perfect as Chanhee. Chanhee is everything that Juyeon could ask for. He is a bestfriend, a lover, a first love all wrapped up in one person. And he also supports Juyeon's dreams, even helping him practice with singing — an aspect that Juyeon isn't much confident in.

When Juyeon finally debuted, Chanhee was there in his showcase to congratulate him. When Juyeon's group got their first win, Chanhee surprised him with a cake. When Juyeon became a cover model for a magazine for the first time, Chanhee pre-ordered a hundred copies.

Really, Juyeon has everything a person could ask for. A stable career, supportive friends, and a loving boyfriend. And he'll make sure it stays that way, with him thinking of proposing to Chanhee anytime soon.

But life isn't just one smooth journey.

"Hee, why are your eyes so red? Did you cry?"

Juyeon's group just finished promotions, and they have two weeks to rest before they start preparing for another comeback. The first thing Juyeon did was visit his boyfriend, since they haven't talked much due to Juyeon's busy schedule.

"Oh, are they?" Chanhee rubbed his eyes. "I got carried away with the drama I was watching."

Juyeon pursed his lips. It sounds like Chanhee is lying, but Juyeon knows that he can't push him into saying the truth. He'll just wait 'til Chanhee is ready to open up to him.

"I forgot I'm cooking bibimbap for you. Wait for me."

Juyeon nodded and Chanhee goes straight to the kitchen. Juyeon's eyes wandered around the whole house, it's been weeks since he last visited but it looks like he haven't been there for years. Everything looks different. Chanhee must have done another decorating spree. Juyeon chuckled at the thought.

He felt a buzz beside him, and Juyeon spotted Chanhee's phone sitting beside him at the sofa. Chanhee must have left it there. He took it and typed the password — which is their anniversary. His eyebrows furrowed when he went to the message app. Since when did Chanhee — an introvert — have many textmates?

But another look at the messages made Juyeon realize that those aren't textmates. Haters. They're people who regularly texts Chanhee disgusting and hurtful things.

_Can you die already?_

_Why are you still with Juyeon-oppa? You're just destroying his career..._

_God, you annoy me so much. Kill yourself already._

_You think you're pretty just because you're dating Juyeon? Bitch._

Juyeon has always been open with his relationship with Chanhee eversince he debuted. Others think it's a bad move because he's still a rookie, but surprisingly, everyone became supportive of their relationship. Maybe it's because Juyeon only has a small fanbase, but nevertheless it was nice that everyone is accepting. But when Juyeon started receiving acting and modelling gigs, he started attracting more fans. And those fans were very possessive. They hated Chanhee with every inch of their body for being with their idol.

Juyeon knows about the hate, and has tried numerous times to tell his fans to stop attacking Chanhee, but his attempts always fail. Chanhee told him that it's fine, that he isn't affected with their words, but Juyeon can see how much Chanhee is struggling to deal with the hate.

"I'm breaking up with you."

"What?" Chanhee's smile fell. He looks pretty with his make up today, with the sun's rays hitting him from the window in the café that they're in two months later.

"Let's end things right here."

Chanhee chuckled. "Since when did you learn to joke around? Get up or else we'll be late for the movie."

"Wait, Chanhee." Juyeon grabbed Chanhee, who already rose from his chair, by the arm. "I'm not joking, I want to break up with you."

Juyeon has been thinking of this for days. The hate Chanhee has been receiving just keeps getting worse. As the number of gigs Juyeon is accepting increases, so does the number of people telling Chanhee to kill himself too. Their other friends have been telling Juyeon how frequent Chanhee cries, and no matter how much Chanhee tries to hide or deny it, Juyeon can clearly see that Chanhee is hurting too much because of the mean comments.

Juyeon loves Chanhee and he can't afford to lose him, but he'll rather see Chanhee happy without him; without all the negativity, than be with someone who can't even protect him from all the animosities.

"But... why?" Chanhee asks him.

"I—" Juyeon gulped. It's not true, but he can't bear to say it. "Times have been tough, and I'm so busy with my schedule nowadays that I think it's best for us to just go on our separate ways."

"So you're telling me we'll break up because you're what? Busy? Why are you saying that only now?"

"Look Chanhee, I can't be the perfect boyfriend that I used to be because of my job. I'm neglecting you, so we should just break up."

Juyeon can see how Chanhee bit his lip hard just to not cry. But he can see how his eyes are shining and how tears are threatening to fall. Chanhee wasn't strong enough, the tears streamed down his cheeks and honestly, Juyeon wants to wipe them away and hug Chanhee until he's not sad anymore.

"That's... not true." Chanhee whispered. "You're lying. You're not looking at me straight in the eye. Is it because of your fans? All the hate they keep throwing at me? Juyeon I told you they don't affect me!"

Juyeon's fists tightened. "I don't wanna be with you anymore. Can't you understand that, Chanhee? I don't love you anymore."

Chanhee wiped his tears and glared at him. "Look at me straight in the eye and tell me that you don't love me anymore!"

Juyeon inhaled deeply before looking Chanhee directly in the eye. He needs to finish this quickly. He needs to get out of here before he breaks down too.

"I don't love you anymore — for a while now, actually. I'm just finding the right moment to tell you this. All these schedules make me so tired, and I still have to drag myself to your house because I have to fulfill the responsibilities I have as your boyfriend. I'm tired, Chanhee. I can't pretend that I still love you when in reality, you're now a burden to me."

Chanhee laughed softly, but tears are still falling down from his eyes. "You know, when you debuted, I was told to breakup with you, because being in a relationship with an idol is dangerous. But I didn't give in, I didn't give up on us, because I thought you're different from others. Because I know that you really love me." Chanhee paused.

_"I should've known that you weren't any better."_

**PART2 ◆ hi, i miss you.**   
**bye, you don't want me back.**

"Juyeon, don't forget that you have a photoshoot today."

Juyeon absent-mindedly nodded. He looked back at the window of his car and stared at the billboards displayed outside. He saw one showcasing fresh tomatoes and smiled a little. He remembered he would always tease Chanhee that he looks like a tomato and will always laugh at his reactions. He finds it cute at how Chanhee gets so offended at being compared to a fruit.

Chanhee.

It's been three years since Juyeon last saw him. During the first days of their break up, Juyeon can't take it anymore and called him, only to find out that he was blocked. In every form of communication, actually — social media, telephone, cellphone, and even from their other friends and Chanhee's family. Then Juyeon found out that Chanhee's family moved away. Chanhee disappeared like magic, and Juyeon doesn't have any way to contact him.

But that doesn't mean that Juyeon has moved on. He loves Chanhee; he always have, and always will. Even when fans ship him with someone else, even if other celebrities tried asking him out, his heart still belongs to Chanhee.

But does Chanhee's heart still belong to him?

"You'll be working with someone, but I haven't met him personally." His manager kept talking. "They told me his name is New. What a weird name, right? But apparently New is a famous vlogger and Instagram influencer these days. He also posts song covers on Youtube and I looked him up and saw that he did a cover on one of your songs. But you know what, Ju? He looks a bit familiar—"

"Hyung." Juyeon called his manager. "Can you keep it down?"

"Are you going to sleep? My bad."

Juyeon's not gonna sleep. He just needs silence. He's feeling emotional right now, and it's not because he's tired or something.

It's because today is his and Chanhee's anniversary.

Juyeon smiled bitterly. If only they didn't broke up, they would be celebrating their 9th anniversary now.

Juyeon misses him. He misses Chanhee. And it would be a lie if he says that he doesn't love him anymore. He wants to see him again, to hold him again, to talk to him again, but he doesn't know where he is. He has no news. He doesn't even know if he's still single or in a relationship already.

"We're here."

They arrived at the place of the shoot an hour later. Juyeon stepped inside at the building and was met with the people who he'll work with today. He was pushed to a chair for him to be dolled up, while being told that his partner will meet him in a few minutes.

"We'll be starting in an hour." A man walked up to him, holding a camera. Juyeon squinted his eyes when he saw the face. He looks familiar. Is it—

"Changmin!" Juyeon called the photographer. "Is that you?"

Changmin gave him a small smile. "I am. Long time no see, Juyeon."

Juyeon felt himself become happy after seeing his friend. Changmin is Chanhee and Juyeon's high school friend, and when the two broke up, Changmin also disappeared from his radar. Seeing Changmin gave Juyeon hope. If he saw Changmin after years, then maybe he can see Chanhee too.

"Is Chanhee... doing okay?" He asked him quietly. Changmin raised a brow. "I haven't heard from him in years."

"Of course, you don't." Changmin chuckled. "He completely blocked you in his life. Don't worry, he's doing well. Even better than you can imagine."

Juyeon already knew that, but he still can't help but be down after hearing Changmin's words. But at least Chanhee is doing okay. That's what he wants when he broke up with Chanhee afterall.

"Changmin! Do I really have to temporarily dye my hair black? My pink hair looks good on its own!"

"Speaking of the devil." Changmin rolled his eyes.

"You know I hate having black hair! It reminds me of the time I was with Ju—" Another man walked up to him, and Juyeon's breath almost stopped when he realized who it was.

"Chanhee." Juyeon breathed out.

"Oh." Chanhee raised a brow at Changmin. "You should've told me he's going to be my partner. I got excited over nothing."

Changmin laughed. "But I was right, didn't I? Your partner would be handsome."

"I was actually hoping I can have another fun tonight, but whatever."

"You should stop doing one night stands, you know? You might get STDs."

"Please, I definitely won't. It's not like I hook up with cheap-ass people."

Juyeon's eyes just wandered to and from Chanhee and Changmin. It seems like the two boys already forgot that he was still there. The thought that Chanhee has hook-ups still haven't entered his mind, for now all he's thinking is _Chanhee, Chanhee, Chanhee_. He can't believe that he's finally seeing Chanhee again. He's real, and not just a product of Juyeon's dreams and imaginations anymore. He can actually hold Chanhee again, talk to him, hug him.

That is, if Chanhee will allow it.

"Before I forget, Chanhee meet your partner for this shoot! Just in case you already forgot, this is Juyeon, a popular actor and a former member of The Boyz."

"Yeah, yeah. I remember." Chanhee laughed. The boy turned to him and lent a hand. Juyeon accepted his hand to shake it and holy fuck, is it cold as hell. Juyeon looked directly at Chanhee's eyes, finding out what Chanhee is feeling right now that they finally met again.

Juyeon knows his eyes are full of longing right now, longing to be with him again, and he expected Chanhee's eyes to show the same. But he was wrong. Although a smile, which Juyeon assumes is fake, was plastered on his face, Chanhee's eyes convey nothing. No emotion or feeling or anything like Juyeon was expecting. They were expressionless, brown orbs that are looking back at Juyeon.

"And Juyeon, meet Chanhee. An Instagram influencer and vlogger that's very famous these days. And oh, he also goes by the name New."

The photoshoot was very... awkward, to say the least. The shoot requires them to get closer with each other, and although Chanhee acts like he's okay with it, Juyeon can feel that Chanhee doesn't want to be there, to be beside him.

His intuition was proven to be correct when Chanhee immediately barged out the door the moment their pictorial ended.

His manager quickly approached Juyeon, handing him a bottle of water. "So you better change clothes immediately because after this you have a meeting regarding the new drama—"

"Hyung, please wait for a moment." Juyeon immediately walked out of the building to chase Chanhee. He can hear his manager shouting for him to come back. For a moment Juyeon got scared and thought of going back, but he decided he can deal with him later. For now, he has to have a talk with Chanhee. Chanhee is more important.

"Chanhee!"

He spot Chanhee at the parking lot, and the boy stopped on his tracks though he didn't turn around to look at Juyeon.

"Chanhee." Juyeon called him again, and this time Chanhee responded.

"What do you want?"

"Hee... Can we talk?"

"We're already talking." Chanhee replied, still not facing Juyeon.

Juyeon sighed. Three years have passed, but he's still the same stubborn Chanhee that he knows. "Just the two of us, in a private place."

"Why do we even need to talk?" Chanhee finally faced him, his arms crossed. "I thought you don't want me anymore. You're _tired_ of me, aren't you? I'm just a burden. Why do you want to talk with a burden?"

Juyeon's shoulders fell at Chanhee's words. "No, that's not true."

"Really? Isn't that what you told me in the café three years ago? Don't tell me you forgot already, Juyeon."

Juyeon walked forward to Chanhee and looked at him. God, is he so different from the Chanhee that he loves. He looks fiercer and stronger, but at the same time he still looks like the soft, kind-hearted Chanhee Juyeon knows.

Juyeon also knows that he's shaking, and he looks ridiculous in front of Chanhee right now. But he can't help it. He finally saw him after three long years. "I miss you." He walked closer. "So damn much."

"That's nice and all but I'm sorry I can't say the same." Chanhee gave him a sarcastic smile. "Can you excuse me? I still have a schedule to go to."

Chanhee turned around to leave, but Juyeon stopped him by grabbing his hand. Like the same way he grabbed him when he wanted to break up with him. "I need to tell you something."

"Is it important? I'm gonna be late." Chanhee removed Juyeon's grip from his arm and shot him a quick glance.

"Two minutes. Just give me two minutes." Deep inside, Juyeon was panicking. He never saw this moment coming. He doesn't know what to say. He isn't prepared.

Chanhee tilted his head to the side. "Sure. Your time starts now."

Juyeon got surprised and tried to organize his thoughts properly, forming incoherent words in the process. "I, uh, I regret breaking up with you. What I said in the café back then wasn't true. T-the truth is, I just felt bad that you're receiving so much hate and I can't do anything to stop it that's I broke up with you. Uhm, honestly when we broke up I was also broken. It took me a while to have energy again, because I miss you so much."

Chanhee keeps looking at his watch while Juyeon tries his best to mumble all of the words out. "Five."

"Three years have passed, but I still haven't moved on."

"Four."

"I miss you, Hee. I really do."

"Three."

"Fuck, Chanhee, I still love you."

"Two."

"And I want you back."

"One."

"Please... let's be together again."

"Times up." Chanhee looked at him boredly. "You want me back? After hurting my heart and pride so much? After making me hate myself for being such a burden and for not being a good boyfriend? When all along you could have just told me the reason why you're breaking up with me?" Chanhee chuckled dryly. "I say that's bullshit. I wish I can say I miss you too, Ju. I really do. But I don't."

Juyeon smiled weakly. What was he even expecting? Chanhee agrees immediately?

"It was nice seeing you again for the first time since forever, Ju. But can you do me a favor?" Chanhee took a step backward, staring at Juyeon directly in the eye as he does so. "Promise me this is the last."

**PART3 ◆ hi, i love you too.**   
**bye, i don't want you back.**

When Chanhee was young, he was always asked what he wants to be when he grows up. The timespan of him thinking what to answer varies, but it all comes down to one answer — he doesn't know. Chanhee doesn't know what to do in the future. He doesn't have a dream, a goal or even a dream job.

But when he and Juyeon became together, Chanhee finally had one: he swore to love and take care of Juyeon until they're both old. He wants to be with him until death. Because he loves him so much; even if his family is against him loving an idol, even if the world is against their relationship, even if he has to endure getting hate every time he wakes up.

Juyeon.

Juyeon was Chanhee's life. He was the best thing that ever happened to his life, and Chanhee always deems himself lucky for getting someone as perfect as him. Chanhee always thanks the heavens for giving him someone like Juyeon. His life revolves around him only, and he always dreams about their life together in the future.

But not everyone can have their happily ever afters.

When Juyeon broke up with him at the café, he was devastated. Hurt. Heartbroken. He locked himself in his room and just cried for days, refusing to see other people. He spent the days thinking about what made Juyeon break up with him. He spent the days hating himself.

_Why do you have to be such a burden?_

_You only have one thing to do: be a good boyfriend, and you failed even that._

_You're pathetic. And a cry baby. That must've been the reason why he got tired._

_Maybe you're just not interesting for him at all._

All the thoughts and the mean comments pushed Chanhee over the edge, and at one point it even made him intake a dozen sedatives. Luckily, Changmin and Kevin stopped him before he can swallow it all. It took him hours of talk with his two friends and a lot of tears before Chanhee realized that it isn't worth it. _Juyeon isn't worth it._ Juyeon left him and hurt him, so what? Life doesn't stop there. He can still move on.

Chanhee started building his life up again piece by piece. He cut off all forms of communication he has with Juyeon, he changed his number, he moved back to Jeonju with his family. There he started doing things for himself. He set up a channel where he posts song covers. When he felt confident enough, he also posted vlogs and posted pictures on Instagram. Slowly, Chanhee's life started to have meaning again.

Chanhee can say he is successful now. But sometimes he can't help but still think of Juyeon. Sometimes he can't help but still miss him. Sometimes he wonders if he's doing well, if he's still struggling to cook by himself, if he still stumbles on carpets, if someone is taking care of him the same way Chanhee takes care of Juyeon.

But all those thoughts will be followed by memories of him being left alone in the café, crying. It will be followed by memories of him receiving texts from Juyeon's fans saying he deserves what happened to him. Memories of him almost trying to end his life, and suddenly, Chanhee's longing will be replaced with hatred and bitterness.

Chanhee's life took a 360° change. He became a person who's afraid of commitment. He had hook-ups, but he cuts ties immediately after he gets what he wants — short-term happiness and pleasure. Chanhee became a heartbreaker, an arrogant person, and people will tell him that it's such a shame he let himself become a horrible person.

 _But Juyeon made him like this._ Chanhee will rather be the person who makes people cry than be the person who cries. One time is already enough for Chanhee. He won't bother crying and hurting again because of someone. _Enough is enough._

"I saw him chasing you right after the shoot ended. Did you guys talk?"

Chanhee nodded at the other end of the line even though Changmin can't see him. "Yeah. I gave him two minutes to talk then I left."

"What did he say?"

"Some bullshit. He said that the real reason he broke up with me is because he doesn't want me to get hurt by his fans. But eh, I don't really care anymore."

"Are you sure?"

Chanhee rolled his eyes. "Changmin, we talked about this."

"Don't think I didn't hear you murmur Juyeon's name sometimes whenever we go drinking. The way he looks at you a while ago... He still loves you, Chanhee. Why don't you give him a chance?"

"Are you serious right now?" Chanhee groaned when the stoplight turned red just before he can cross the road. "He _hurt_ me, Changmin. My self-esteem lowered because I thought I was not enough for him. And now you want me to give him a chance? I won't. Not even on my next life."

"Hee..."

"Don't call me that. You know I hate that nickname."

Chanhee heard Changmin sigh on the other end. "It's time you two finally talk things through. At least have a closure or something. You can't spend your whole life hating on him."

"Uh, yes I can. Why are you suddenly being on his side?"

"Because I'm not biased. Chanhee, it's time you finally become happy. As in genuinely happy. And I think the only way you can be happy is if you talk with Juyeon."

"Are you Choi Chanhee? Why do you act like you know me more than I know myself? I'm tired, Chang. I still have another shoot. Talk to me when Juyeon finally stops brainwashing you."

"He's not brainwa—"

Chanhee ended the call before Changmin can even defend himself. He chuckled dryly. Give Juyeon a chance? Why? He doesn't need him already. He's doing fine on his own. He doesn't need and want him back.

**PART4 ◆ hi, you want me back**   
**bye, but i can't and i won't**

After that "unfortunate incident" in the café three years ago, Chanhee's heart became a heart of stone. He promised himself to never give his heart again easily. He promised himself to never be easily affected by sweet words and heart-fluttering gestures. Especially if it's for someone like Juyeon.

Chanhee never wanted to see Juyeon ever again. And he thought he made it clear with what he said back in the parking lot. But it seems like Juyeon's comprehension skills are still lacking until today, because Chanhee received a bouquet of flowers in his table after he woke up.

"It's from him." Changmin said. "I didn't tell him your address so he just gave it to me in hopes that I can give it to you."

Chanhee looked at the flowers placed on the center table of his living room. He doesn't know what kind of flowers those are, but they were color blue and white. He doesn't know if it's a coincidence, but those are his favorite colors.

"What does he want?"

Changmin shrugged. "Maybe he wants you back?"

"What a joke." Chanhee stood up to freshen himself up in the bathroom. "Throw those away."

"Mr. Choi, you might want to come with me for a second." Chanhee opened his eyes and looked at one of the staff.

"Why?"

"Someone sent you, uh, flowers and we don't know where to put them."

Chanhee furrowed his eyebrows. "You can give it to my manager? It isn't hard to place them somewhere."

"That's the thing, Mr. Choi. It's not just a single bouquet. It's a whole truck."

"What?" Chanhee stood up, blinking his eyes a few times. "As in a literal truck? A vehicle?"

The staff nodded, surprise still evident on his face. "The driver told me it's for you, and to tell you that it's from someone named Ju."

"Hyung! Hyung! Hyung!" Chanhee opened one eye when he heard his brother's annoying voice early in the morning.

"Keep it down, Eric!"

Eric's muffled voice from outside of his room got louder. "I can't! You never told me that you're not single anymore!"

"I'm not! Don't believe in such rumors." Chanhee rolled his eyes as he turned on his bed. He placed two small pillows in front of both of his ears to block his brother's loud voice. He was drifting back to sleep when Eric shouted again.

"So the rumor with you and Juyeon-hyung is not true?!"

"What?" Chanhee rose up from his bed and opened his bedroom door to face Eric. "What do you mean a rumor with that dick?"

Eric winced. "Uh, censor please? I'm still a child."

"Shut up. A child doesn't just make out with Hyunjoon in my damn couch." Chanhee grabbed both of the younger's shoulders. "Tell me the rumor."

"Okay, okay!" Eric removed Chanhee's grip from him and fished his pocket for his phone. He scrolled through it and showed Chanhee an article.

_Fans found actor Lee Juyeon liking influencer New's Instagram posts and speculate a relationship between the two._

"It's crazy, hyung. It said here that Juyeon-hyung liked all of your posts — every single one of them since you opened an Insta! Then he also commented some stuff that lowkey hints that there's something going on between the two of you. How come you never saw this, hyung? You should've received some notifications from him!"

"I-I don't really check the comments." Chanhee scrolled through the article and read all the screenshots of Juyeon commenting on his posts. It's a variety of comments. Some are simple hearts and emojis, while some comments are literal words like "I hope you had fun!" and "Pretty~".

Chanhee clicked his tongue. He already said it, and he will say it again — Lee Juyeon is an insensitive, inconsiderate asshole. What was he even thinking? How can he just comment stuff like that on his account? Didn't he thought of the possible consequences when fans will see what he has done?

Speaking of fans, Changee hurriedly checked the comments. The article was posted only an hour ago, but there are thousands of comments already.

_Isn't that Juyeon-oppa's boyfriend from a few years ago?_

_Ah, Chanhee has become more good-looking than the last time I saw him._

_Looks like Juyeon still loves him..._

_New is far too perfect to be with someone like Juyeon. New deserves better!!_

_Oh my god, Chanhee still hasn't given up even after getting dumped?_

Chanhee returned the phone back to Eric and retrieved his own to call his manager. "Lee Juyeon, you son of a bitch."

**PART5 ◆ hi, i love you**   
**and i'll never say bye again**

Sometimes Chanhee wondered how the fuck did Juyeon even graduated. Not because of how low his grades are due to being a trainee, but because Juyeon is simply just an idiot. What part of "let's never meet again" and "I don't want you back" does he not understand? Really, even a kindergartner can understand Chanhee and will stay away from his path but Juyeon... Juyeon has been making his presence known to Chanhee for a few weeks now. Whether it'd be sending flowers, oral messages, or comments through social media, Juyeon always finds a way to pester Chanhee, even if it's already making him look like an idiot.

But let's be honest, Chanhee is not hard to please. Even if he tried his best to train his heart to not fall easily, he still does. He will be lying if he says he doesn't like that Juyeon is trying to reach out to him. He will be lying if he says he doesn't miss him and he doesn't want him back too. If he was the old Chanhee he would've come running back in Juyeon's arms the moment he saw him again, but Chanhee learned that it's better to just pretend that he loathes him than risk his heart again by being with him.

"Stop this." Chanhee dropped the bouquet of flowers in front of Juyeon. Fate is really playing with him. He has to re-take the shoot that he did with Juyeon because of an accidental mistake. Which means he got to see him in personal again. And this time, Juyeon brought another set of flowers for him and even gave it to him in front of everybody.

"Stop what?"

"You're just making yourself look like a fool! Aren't you tired? Because I am. I'm sick and tired of seeing you try to win me back. Give it up, Juyeon. I won't take you back."

Juyeon chuckled and Chanhee clenched his fists. He really wants to shout and snap at him, but being inside Juyeon's dressing room with tons of people outside limits the volume of Chanhee's voice.

"I'm not tired, Chanhee. And I'll never be, as long as we're still not okay."

"Then good luck making yourself look stupid. You're just clowning yourself." Chanhee turned his heels to walk away but Juyeon, _Lee Fucking Juyeon_ , did what he always does best — he stopped him by grabbing him by the arm.

Chanhee opened his mouth to complain, but before he can do it, he was cut off by Juyeon's lips. He was caught by surprise, but Chanhee didn't bother doing anything. He stayed still, to show that he doesn't like what Juyeon is doing. But Juyeon placed both of his hands in Chanhee's cheeks and that's when Chanhee knew that he's screwed.

He responded to the kiss, melting under Juyeon's touch. He miss this. He miss _him_. He has kissed a ton of people after their break up, but none of them gave the same heart-fluttering feeling that Chanhee always feels with Juyeon. He wrapped his arms around Juyeon's neck and deepened the kiss, only to suddenly realize what he's doing.

He pushed Juyeon away and glared at him. But the older just gave Chanhee a smile. A bright one filled with happiness and hope.

"You kissed me."

"Asshole." Chanhee hissed. "You're the one who kissed me first!"

"But you kissed me back." Juyeon cupped Chanhee's face and looked at him in the eye. "There's still something there. I knew it. You have no idea how happy it makes me feel."

"Get your hands off of me." Chanhee replied, trying to put on a brave front, but his voice and face says so otherwise. His voice cracked, and Chanhee's face softened. He can feel his knees wobbling. Juyeon looks so... happy, and it's been a long time since he last saw Juyeon happy because of him.

"I wasn't kidding when I said I still love you. I know what I did is shitty, and I should've just said the truth. I made you experience hell, and Chanhee... Baby, I'm so sorry. _For everything._ I didn't think it through. But believe me when I say I regret it so much." Juyeon said. His voice is wavering and Chanhee can see a few tears threatening to fall from his eyes. He stopped the urge to wipe those tears away.

Chanhee just looked away. God, he wants to get away from there as far as possible. Not because he doesn't like Juyeon, but because he's afraid he too might cry anytime soon.

Juyeon made him face him again. "I love you so much, and I want to spend my life with you. Remember back in highschool? When we always skip school and eat ice cream at the top of the hill, while talking about random things? You said you want to get married with me in the future, then we'll live in a house near a beach, and adopt a puppy that looks prettier than Changmin's. We can still do that, Hee. We can still spend our lives with each other. Just let me be with you."

Chanhee gulped. He can't believe Juyeon still remembers all their talks. It was one of the things he likes about Juyeon. Juyeon is a listener, and he always patiently listens to Chanhee rant about random things, or tell him about what he wants for their future.

"But Juyeon, your fans..."

"I don't care if everyone doesn't approve of us anymore! I'll protect you properly now, or I can quit my job for you, if it means getting you back."

"Juyeon stop this." Chanhee removed Juyeon's hands from his face. "It isn't worth it. Our relationship is not the same anymore. It's already damaged because of the past."

"Yes, it's damaged. Badly damaged, but I can't let you go. Hee, your love's too good to lose. And I'm not gonna make the same mistake again. I'm choosing you over everything."

Chanhee bit his lip to supress the tears, but it's so hard. Especially when Juyeon is in front of him, cheeks wet with tears. Eyes full of hope and regret. Voice wavering because of desperation. Chanhee can't help but cry.

"I love you and I miss you too but Juyeon... I don't really think we can work this out again." Chanhee whispered.

Chanhee's heart may have given in, but Chanhee is still scared. What if Juyeon won't stay true to his words? What if fate just doesn't want them to end up together? What if he'll just end up heartbroken again? Chanhee is still traumatized with his last relationship with him, and he's afraid that it's just going to happen all over again.

"N-no, we can make this work. Just trust me, Hee. Trust us." Juyeon held both of his hands and kissed them.

And that's it. Chanhee finally broke down. He withdrew his hands from Juyeon and fell to the floor, hugging his knees while he cries. It's been so long since he last cried. It's been so long since he bottled everything up just to move on from Juyeon. He doesn't know what to do. He feels so vulnerable.

Chanhee felt a pair of arms wrap around him. He felt Juyeon carressed his hair while he also sobs. "We'll start all over again. It's going to be hard, but it will be worth it. I love you so much."

Chanhee looked up and stared at Juyeon's swollen eyes. He smiled, for the first time today. "You insensitive, inconsiderate asshole. I can't really say no to you, can I?"

Juyeon returned the gesture. "I miss your smile." He whispered instead. "I miss you so much."

Chanhee laughed softly as he wiped his tears away. "I can't count how many times you've said that since we met again. But it's okay, I miss you too."

Juyeon helped Chanhee get up and placed his hand in front of him. "Hi, I'm Lee Juyeon, an actor." He suddenly said.

Chanhee looked at him, confused. But he quickly got what Juyeon was implying. _They're really starting over._ He smiled wider and took Juyeon's hand. "Choi Chanhee, influencer."

"It's nice to finally say 'hi'." Juyeon shook his hand.

Chanhee nodded. "And I hope we'll never say goodbye again."

"Don't worry, we won't." Juyeon engulfed him in a hug. "Not anymore."


End file.
